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Getting your Husband Involved in Caring for Your Baby
* 10 ways to encourage your husband to be more involved in your
baby’s care. *
You know he loves you and your little one, but some husbands are
a little hesitant to really get into the baby care trenches.
They may not have any experience with babies or children.
Unfortunately little boys are still not given as many
opportunities to take care of dolls or practice nurturing.
Luckily, most fathers today expect to be involved with their
families and are open to sharing the responsibilities with their
wives. The following is a list of some ideas for getting him
involved.
1. Start early. While you are still expecting or going through
the adoption process, talk about how you want to parent your
child. Involve him in prenatal doctor visits, reading books,
even television shows such as “A Baby Story” will help both of
you know what to expect and get the conversation moving. Take
baby care classes before your baby comes home. You will learn a
lot and meet other expecting parents as well. Even if you are
the one who is pregnant, you are both expecting!
2. Do it together. If neither of you has any experience, it can
be reassuring to do things as a team. Never given your baby a
bath? You’ll definitely need two people for this little
adventure. Talk to each other before, during and after to
exchange ideas and learn from the experience. The more
comfortable your husband becomes with baby care, the more ready
he will be to take them on himself.
3. Don’t hover. It is hard to try new things in front of others.
Imagine if you were told to draw a picture of your baby while an
experienced artist watched. Yes, she may be able to help you
along, but it would be a nerve-racking experience! Unless it is
a safety issue, let him try his own way of doing things. If it
is a safety issue, explain why it is important. For example,
“The baby book I read said to always strap your baby onto the
changing table so she won’t roll off. Do you agree that we
should do that?”
4. Disappear for awhile. Once you are comfortable that he knows
the ropes, give him time alone with the baby. This will help him
bond and experience baby care without a safety net. Whether it
is a trip to the store or a trip to the shower, a little alone
time goes a long way.
5. Get him reading. Keep baby magazines in the bathroom. Sadly,
that may be the only place either of you gets any reading done
right now!
6. Ask for help. You may think that your attempt to change a
crying baby’s diaper while simultaneously singing, shaking a
rattle and doing your taxes would be enough to get your dear
hubby’s attention. To his credit, he may just figure that you
are so capable that you *still* don’t need a hand. Don’t be
afraid to ask him to take care of your little one. He is the
baby’s parent, too!
7. Fill him in. If your husband works at an office all day, he
will likely miss out on a few things. Let him know what your
baby is up to while he is gone. Give him a call and have your
baby babble into the phone. Instant Message him and have the
baby type! The idea is to keep him in the loop.
8. Show off the fun side of parenting. Having a baby is more
than diapers and feedings. Take your husband toy shopping with
you, show him how much your little one loves “peek-a-boo” or
cuddle all together on the couch. He may surprise you by finding
a whole new way to get your baby to giggle!
9. Hang out with other parents. It seems like moms naturally
seek out other moms to talk to. Dads may need you to hook them
up! You may be able to find a local parenting group that
welcomes dads, or invite a mom friend to bring her family over
for a meal. You will find that the dads will naturally end up
talking about something baby related.
10. Be patient. Some dads need a little time to get into the
swing of things. As babies get bigger, it gets easier for guys
to play chase, ball or tickle monster with your little one.
The more your husband is involved with parenting, the tighter
your family unit will be. It benefits you, it benefits him, and
of course it benefits your baby!
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